eHarmony starts new casual dating site

Not content with dominating the compatibility testing dating market, eHarmony.com have come up with a site that aims to compete with Match.

Continue Reading Add comment August 29th, 2010

Gay Parship now worldwide

The fact that Parship, the dating site with the most comprehensive compatibility test, has a gay / lesbian offshoot may come as a surprise to you, especially if you live outside of the UK.

Well, now their gay dating site, gay-parship.com has gone international and is available in 9 (count them) different languages.

Check it out if you’re gay and looking for a serious relationship. The way this site handles things like communications and even viewing pictures is a bit different to most dating sites you’re likely to come across. Handy if you’re tired of the more meat-market sites.

If you’re not gay, you might want to give the straight Parship site a go.

Add comment August 23rd, 2010

Online dating profile advice – good or bad?

Well well well, it seems that online dating profile advice such as the kind I offer on this blog has finally made the BBC news headlines.

They have an article talking about the industry of helping people with their profiles and asking whether it’s good or bad, i.e. whether it’s a legitimate thing for people to want to do or whether it’s fraud.

Continue Reading Add comment July 11th, 2010

Online dating – who’s responsible for your safety?

New research suggests online daters have a false sense of security when dating online. But is the increasingly popular trend of pushing for intrusive background checks the way the online industry should go?

Continue Reading Add comment June 30th, 2010

New dating sites matches opposites – does that work?

A new dating site aims to match up complete opposites but is this concept really helpful or is it just another gimmick with no purpose apart from making the site some money?

Continue Reading Add comment June 29th, 2010

Online dating and the World Cup – get in there!

You can try to ignore the FIFA world cup, but chances are that if you are in the UK, you won’t be able to. Signs, flags, big screen TVs and the eternal sound of the dreaded vuvuzelas are everywere and online dating, too, takes its traditional hit, with a small but significant slump during game time.

Continue Reading Add comment June 18th, 2010

Lovestruck.com release Android app

I already wrote about the Lovestruck.com iPhone app. Seeing as Lovestruck is aimed predominantly at busy city professionals who are often on the move, it makes sense. Now there is an Android app too, allowing owners of the Google Phone to also interact with their online dates while away from the PC. More smart phones are to follow.
These apps serve London and the UK’s other major cities, plus New York, Dublin, Tokyo, Hong Kong, Singapore and Sydney.

Lovestruck.com, in case you’re wondering, is a location-based online dating site aimed at city professionals in the world’s major cities.

Add comment May 11th, 2010

An online dating sites for fans of Apple?

Niche dating sites are all the rage nowadays, aimed at people who value certain aspects of their lives and want to start off their search for love by looking for people who share their interests and hobbies.
Now there is a site dedicated to fans of Apple, the company and its products. The new site, Cupidtino requires all its users to be owners of an Apple device and to be enamoured with it.

Continue Reading 1 comment May 6th, 2010

Online dating better for marriage than meeting in bars

Here’s a bit of interesting news – online dating apparently yields more marriages than meeting people in bars. It’s now the third most common method of meeting people for marriage.

Continue Reading 2 comments May 3rd, 2010

Ashley Madison to open in the UK

US cheaters’ dating website, Ashley Madison is apparently going to expand to the UK market. I can’t wait to see the response their incredibly annoying ads will get in the UK. Apparently UK cheaters looking to have affairs can already register on the site, but there hasn’t been any marketing done yet in the UK.

For the record, I think cheating is a complex issue and you can’t (or shouldn’t) judge everyone who cheats and condemn them to hell. I find it sad, more than anything else. Sad that people can be so bad at communicating, they’d go behind people’s backs rather than be open about their own needs with themselves or each other. It’s also sad that in the 21st century there are still people trapped in loveless marriages without being able to legally or safely leave.

On the other hand, I’m not entirely keen on so-called “lifestyle cheaters” – people who knowingly choose to cheat on their spouses / partners because they enjoy the thrill of the forbidden. I’m certainly not keen on sites such as Ashley Madison that actively encourage people to cheat on their partners and then pocket the cash.

Still, I’d rather people who want to cheat go somewhere like that and leave the normal dating sites to actual singles.

What do you think? Will this site get a good reception in the UK? Will ads encouraging people to cheat go down well with the British public?

1 comment April 20th, 2010

What are the most commonly used words in online dating?

A tag cloud generated by leading online dating white label company, White Label Dating (responsible for many many dating sites) reveals what the most commonly used words are in online dating messages.
At least for one day, April 13th, 2010.

The most commonly used words were:

bit, here, good, nice, lol, hope, want, looking, chat, love, know, day, live soon

You an see the pretty tag cloud and read the rest of the original blog post here.

What do you reckon? Are those your most commonly used words online?

Add comment April 17th, 2010

You know online dating is mainstream when…

If you needed further proof that online dating is now squarely in the mainstream as a household name, look no further than this BBC comedy-drama.

It follows the online exploits of a middle aged woman looking for love online. There are apparently 4 parts and you can listen to it online.

I’ve not had a chance to listen to it yet, I must say, but it’s good to see the BBC are giving the subject of online dating a stage, even if it’s one of those “candid looks” things that are not particularly flattering.

1 comment April 8th, 2010

Easydate buy Allegran

This will mean very little to anyone who’s not a part of the online dating industry, but Allegran, the company I used to work for (the one that launched my online dating career) has been sold again. This time, it’s been sold to Easydate, who know what they are doing, as far as I can tell, so hopefully we won’t see a repeat of the last sale fiasco, when the Daily Mail Group screwed it all up for everyone (including themselves).

Allegran used to be a market leader in the UK, with some of the best minds in the business. Here’s hoping this sale will do justice to its dating sites and will see them helping more and more people find love in years to come.

Add comment April 6th, 2010

New MatchAffinity TV Campaign

I wrote here a while back about MatchAffinity, the compatibility testing offer from Match.com that’s recently hit the UK.

Well, they’ve just launched a TV campaign. I wonder if it will have the same effect on this site as their other one did on their main site? Could MatchAffinity become another household name in the UK online dating industry?

Have you seen this ad? What do you think?

Add comment April 2nd, 2010

Could online dating be bigger than porn?

It is according to Online Schools who also have some other interesting things to say about the industry…

Via: Online Schools

2 comments March 27th, 2010

Is cheating in relationship indeed the new norm?

Sites like Ashley Madison that actively encourage people to cheat on their spouses are becoming increasingly popular. The Pittsburgh Channel recently ran an article asking whether cheating is now becoming the new norm and whether such sites are responsible for it. But has the state of play really changed so much? Or are we simply being hypocritical and naive?

Continue Reading 2 comments March 11th, 2010

Online dating scams on the rise in Australia

The Australian consumer watchdog reports a rise of 30% in online dating related scams. Could it be because people in Australia are becoming more exposed to online dating and are throwing caution to the wind a little bit too much?

With online dating becoming more and more mainstream, there should be more information available about the potential dangers.
People often put their trust in their dating site, sometimes blindly, and no dating site likes to admit that some scammers may have gotten through.
Having worked as a moderator on a dating site I know how hard it is to catch everyone who’s up to no good. We were always aware of how important it is to catch these people before they fleece innocent daters and steal their money, but even with all the hard work we put in, sometimes these scammers managed to con people before we got to them.

Never assume the site you’re on is 100% safe. No site is. You need to arm yourself with information and learn how to spot a scammer, so you can avoid their nasty plots.

Now’s a good time as ever to brush up on your online dating safety knowledge. Here are some handy online dating safety tips from my book.

Add comment March 4th, 2010

Thinking of going speed dating? You’re in good company.

The next episode of House will see the team going speed dating, with apparently hilarious results.

It’s always good to see trends becoming mainstream enough to be featured on top TV shows, isn’t it?

You can watch the trailer for the episode here

If you’re thinking of taking the plunge yourself, you can take a look at my reviews of speed dating and singles’ events companies.

Add comment March 3rd, 2010

Online dating is still on the rise in the UK

Comscore (an Internet monitoring and market research company) is reporting a 16% rise in use of online dating among Britons. This is particularly interesting considering the global dating market has seen a drop of 1%

Feeling the pinch in the American market, the big online dating companies are going to be putting more effort into their UK campaigns, so I’m guessing we’re going to see a lot more of their advertising in the near future.

Hopefully, this will mean tougher competitions and therefore better deals and more variety for British online daters.

Add comment February 25th, 2010

Do Atheists really get more responses to their online dating messages?

More about the OKcupid survey…
A recent article in the Telegraph reported the results of a statistical survey conducted by free dating site OKCupid. The survey aimed to discover the makings of the perfect first online dating message, on OKcupid at least.

Continue Reading 2 comments September 25th, 2009

Online dating: How long should the first message be?

New figures released by dating site OKCupid reveal some interesting things about online dating response rates and important information about sending your first message to someone online.

Continue Reading 1 comment September 12th, 2009

Online Dating Content

If you’re looking for online dating content for your site, I am currently available for writing services.
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As you may know, unique content is king on the Internet, especially for competitive industries such as online dating. Quality content will help your site stand out so it can be noticed by the search engines and therefore seen by more people.

I can provide dating tips and advice, agony aunt services for your users, dating articles, etc. all written by me according to your specific requirements.

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Add comment July 28th, 2009

Match.com big advertising push in the UK

Has anyone else been seeing the Match.com adverts everywhere recently, or is it just me? they are certainly doing a big advertising push right now.

Continue Reading 2 comments June 16th, 2009

GirlsDateForFree.com – Homepage makeover but still no quiz

GirlsDateForFree is a UK dating site where (as the name suggests) women don’t pay. This has made it extremely popular, as well as somewhat known for being a bit of a party site great for casual dating (though not exclusively for that).

For a while now they’ve been advertising their compatibility quiz on their site, so I wanted to check it out. Alas, it seems to be down and has been for months. I even went as far as sending them a message telling them about it, but nothing has changed. I’ve been giggling about it for a while, but it’s a shame, cause the rest of the features on the site are actually quite decent, including pretty good mobile phone integration. Seems a shame to have a big broken link in the middle of it all.

Meanwhile, their homepage has somewhat of a massive makeover and looks very different, though the rest of the site has not changed. I wonder if they are working on changing the rest of it as well? It’s quite dated, although that has never stopped anyone from using it (and in fact, many people prefer the simplicity of it and the fact that it’s unpretentious). Have you seen the new page? I’m curious as to people’s opinions, so please leave yours below.

2 comments May 9th, 2009

You know a dating site is not right for you when…

Occasionally, I go and check the email account I sign up to sites with when researching them. Sometimes I find useful discounts and offers sent only to registered users to encourage them to subscribe, other times there’s notices of people who contact me or dating tips. Occasionally, the site will try to entice me to return by providing me with a list of potentially suitable matches or new users who recently joined and live in “my area”. I just logged in and found one of those emails telling me about new people in my area. Unfortunately, this was an American site and their UK membership is obviously rather sparse. The “people in my area” were from places like Manchester and Hull. I live in London.

Continue Reading Add comment April 8th, 2009

Plentyoffish in paid upgrade shocker!

OK, maybe it’s not so shocking to most people, but Plentyoffish made its name by advocating 100% free dating. Now you can pay to get a special “badge of honour” that supposedly marks you as a “serious dater”.

Most people who are dating online will have come across Plentyoffish, but, frankly, I am yet to personally hear anything particularly good about the experience. I’m sure some people do well there, but on the whole it’s a scammer and time-waster magnet, mostly because it’s big and free (which is also the reason why most people end up trying it sooner or later).

Continue Reading Add comment March 20th, 2009

The Daily Mail have a new dating site

Seems like a brave step after what happened to their last online dating attempt, but maybe the newspaper link will bring them some more joy this time.

Most major newspapers in the UK have their own dating offerings, which are mostly run for them by other companies, using the newspapers’ branding on top (i.e. white label).

The Mail are, as usual, a bit late to the party, but I’m sure their loyal readers will welcome the chance to network with each other, like the readers of the Guardian and the Times already do.

Add comment March 10th, 2009

OKCupid going downhill?

OKCupid is considered one of the best free dating sites around and its compatibility matching system is known throughout the industry as being one of the best on any site, free or otherwise. Recently, though, it seems to have gone a bit wonky. I’ve had reports from users about funny things going with the algorithm and it giving them wacky, unlikely results.

The advertising on the site has also taken a turn for the worse, with one user spotting an ad sporting some very offensive language that was also derogatory to women.

To top this off, moderation of the website seems to be a bit slow, with obvious scammers being left on the site after several complaints were sent.

What’s going on? Are they trying to make more money by upping their compatiblity stats and lowering their advertising standards?

Say it ain’t so!

1 comment January 26th, 2009

Loopylove has had a mini makeover

Loopylove.com used to be one of the most popular dating sites in the UK. It used to be known as one of the best Internet dating sites for people new to dating online, with a simple, unassuming design and a nice collection of useful features. Then it got sold and had rather an ill-advised botched facelift, making it look both unappealing and ever so slightly pretentious. I’m sure this put quite a few people off dating there, to be honest. Now it’s been sold again, to a company that seems to appreciate a clean, functional design. The pretentious elements are no longer to be found and the site now offers a very simple one page sign up, so people can start running detailed searches much much quicker. Hopefully this will see the return to glory of one of the busiest and easiest sites the UK has ever known!

4 comments January 20th, 2009

Metrodate is now a 100% free online dating site

Great news for cosmopolitan, metropolitan daters everywhere! Metrodate.com, the world’s largest urban dating site is now totally free to use (as in, “no credit card needed ever” free, rather than “sign up free but pay for messages”). Instead of charging for membership, they will sell locally targeted ad space on the site to cover costs.

The site is available in over 220 countries and an impressive selection of different languages. Its main focus is cities (and it offers city guides as well), but apparently it’s now big enough to have members outside of urban areas. I’m guessing it will grow even more now it’s free.

Add comment January 8th, 2009

Allegran sold again?

Looks like the online dating company I used to work for has been sold for a second time, having sacked 70% of its employees only recently. I understand it’s been sold to Easydate. It’s a real shame that a company that used to be so successful went downhill so quickly to the point where it was apparently bleeding money on a daily basis. It used to be one of the most lucrative companies of its kind. This sad ending a long way away from the happy-go-lucky start up Allegran was when I started working there, staffed by brilliant people, many of whom I still call my friends today.

Continue Reading 8 comments November 18th, 2008

Dating site age verification gone wrong

Here’s a seemingly rather shocking case: an American man dating on a sex site met up and slept with a girl whose profile said she was 18, only to discover later (when police surrounded his house) that he’d slept with a 14 year old girl.

Said guy sued said site for damages and lost, which I’m sure will warm the heart of every site owner out there.

I know from experience how hard (read: impossible) it is to prevent people from lying about their age on sites. The girl would have had to borrow her parents’ credit card to sign up to the site, as well as lie about her age. If someone is willing to lie and steal to place a profile on your site, there is very little you can do, unless you start doing serious background checks (and those have already been proven to be somewhat pointless). It’s usually much easier to tell in person whether someone is 14 or 18.

While I feel sorry for the guy and don’t think he should have necessarily received such a heavy penalty, I’m happy to see the law recognising the fact that the site itself is not responsible. The only thing I would say is that maybe the bit in the T&C about not being able to 100% guarantee the information provided by members is accurate should be made a bit clearer, rather than (probably) being hidden somewhere half way down the list. Really, though, a bit of personal responsibility should be factored into any dating experience.

Opinions?

Add comment August 30th, 2007

Is online dating killing romance? Going beyond dating sites

Over the last few weeks, I’ve been in and out of London, enjoying the Great British Festival scene. As a result, I’ve had a chance to speak to a lot of new people from all over the country about “the whole online dating thing”.

I had a number of very interesting conversations with people who all raised the same problem they have with online dating. They all felt that dating sites made the whole process of introduction seem too much like a job application, making it unromantic. They all preferred the old method of going out there and running into people by chance, trusting their heart (or “fate”) to make the right decision for them.

I know online dating professionals often like to talk about how superior the online method is to traditional dating exactly because of the fact that it’s focused and involves making decisions with your head first and then the heart, but personally I feel that this is a matter of personal preference. Some people are always going to be ruled by their heads, while some are more intuitive by nature. Throughout the centuries, people have found love using both of these methods, so I don’t care to fault either one.

Continue Reading 1 comment August 5th, 2007

Why is this (Google) news?

My usual scan of Google news brought up an article telling marketers why they should consider advertising on dating sites.

Online dating is an incredibly fast-growing segment of the Internet. Dating sites received more than 2 million unique visitors from the Nordic countries of Denmark, Finland, Norway and Sweden in Q1 alone. But, is that a good enough reason to advertise within dating sites?

Yes. If the ad is targeted correctly.

Well duh! I’ve never heard of that site, so it might tbe one of those sites that group weak content around adverts, but come on.

I mean, I know some agencies have a hard time getting the idea into their heads that dating sites are good for brand association, because I’ve worked with some agencies that were meant to sell ads on our sites and just never bothered to actually try to sell the space. I also know that because of the long session times and the fact that there are a lot of page views per unique visitors then the amount of money you can get for the traffic is not as high as it could be.

But, with that said, any decent dating site could do some serious, serious targeting – more so than most types of sites out there – simply because of the amount of information they collect about the users (age, sex, location, ethnicity, income, children, education, etc.). People share all that information publicly on their profiles, where they normally wouldn’t put those details into any other website.

Apart from allowing advertisers to get a good idea of the demographics for branding, this is great for direct response stuff, as in actually getting people to click through and buy stuff. I find it hard to believe that there are still people out there who don’t get that. I’d much rather thing it’s just some of the people who write about the industry that are that backwards!

Add comment May 28th, 2007

Dating and socialising online – why are they still two separate things?

In past posts in this blog, I sang the praises of social networking sites and talked about how much more natural the meeting process is on there.
Now, after reading the article linked to below, it’s time to talk about the Other Side

The early adopters of social networking technology were not only those separated from their friends and family by means of physical distance but also those who didn’t quite fit in with their immediate, real life environment. Sites like livejournal and Myspace are notorious for being the haunt of teenage (and older) goths who make use of the exhibitionist nature of those sites in order to finally live out their fantasies of having an active social circle and look mysterious and cool. While the ability to network with others via a mutual friend is very handy, having your friends’ list displayed in a prominent location can make the whole thing turn into a massive popularity contest, a fact which is now much abused by PR companies. People wear their friends and favourite artists like badges of honour, becoming “better people” by having a busy profile. Even the interaction is done publicly, to create the feel of being very socially involved.

Continue Reading 4 comments May 25th, 2007

Women rule the net! (In the UK)

The BBC is reporting the results of a few interesting pieces of research about UK Internet use demographics. Apaprently, The heaviest online users in the UK are not young men, as previously taught, but 18-34 women and men over 50. Interestingly, the most visited websites are said to be those to do with parenting and childcare, as well as high street shop sites and “social networking sites like Facebook”. I’d have thought Myspace was far more popular in the UK. PR plant? Or maybe I’m just wrong?

I wonder if this trend is an indication of a predominance of stay at home moms who spend a lot of time online? when I was at Allegran, our fastest-growing site was DatingForParents and I’ve always felt it fulfiled an actual need, rather than a mere niche.

As for the men over 50, I’m at a loss. It looks like if you’re a guy over 50, looking for a much younger woman, you may actually be in with a chance. Statistically, at least

That aside, it’s always good to get a glimpse at the demographics of your market (tapped or otherwise). New product ideas anyone?

Add comment May 17th, 2007

Promoting your dating site: the PR trick that never gets old

With online dating getting so competitive, it’s getting harder and harder for sites to stand out and get noticed. Companies resort to all kinds of silly and nasty tricks to get media attention, which always amazes me. Why do people go to all that trouble when any decent-sized dating site already has a readily available massive PR resource just waiting to be used?

Continue Reading 3 comments May 1st, 2007

Just in: snazzy divorce headline makes dull read

I was really disappointed with this article that asks whether marriages following online dating hook-ups are more likely to end in divorce. When the headline asks a question like that, I expect it to deliver some sort of hard-hitting research. The answer in this case, however, is “probably not, but we have no way of knowing”. Add that to some PR plant blurb about eHarmony and Mary.com and all you get is a giant yawn. Did we really need to know that “it’s too soon to tell” whether relationship that stem from online dating are better or worse than “standard” relationships? Does having no formal data warrant a whole article dedicated to discussing this non-topic? Poor. Very poor.

Personally, I don’t think there is much of a difference between the results of either of these dating methods. I would be grossly surprised if either turned out to be more effective than the other on a large scale. Traditionalists and luddites will slate digital interaction until they’re blue in the face and online dating academics will claim to have reinvented the wheel, but in reality it’s all much of a muchness. Once you meet your match, the medium or method you used to facilitate that meeting is not really that important.
Some people have better luck meeting others online, while others do better in bars. It’s as simple as that.

Add comment April 29th, 2007

Online dating safety: are we doing enough?

A new report published in the UK, has shown that most British Internet users do not trust online services, but use them anyway because they believe the benefits outweigh the risks. Add that to the fact that many UK users are simply not safety aware and it’s no surprise that people keep getting scammed. Are dating sites doing enough to ensure their users’ online dating safety?

Many dating sites employ moderators to weed out the scammers, but that is not always enough to stop all of them from getting through. Nasty, unethical sites lull their users into a false sense of security, but really what we need is some serious online dating safety education.

How much information is available on your site to educate people about potential dangers? Is it available somewhere obvious, or is it hidden somewhere at the back of the site? The potential existence of scammers on the site is not something any site owner would like to talk about, but really, it’s something that has to be done as part of our responsibility to our customers. Like everything else that is not a positive feature, it should be handled delicately, but it should definitely be handled, rather than swept under the carpet.

Continue Reading Add comment April 21st, 2007

Online dating for the blind?

Two things caught my eye today. One is the development of 3-D maps for the blind by Greek scientists (thank you SmartMobs) and the other is a Danish invention for turning web pages into Braille. Regina Lynn comments on how 3-D mapping could be applied to sexual exploration and it got me thinking about how these two new pieces of technology could be applied to the online dating world. Could turning people’s photographs into 3-d maps be possible at some point soon? Could blind people be reading dating profiles in Braille? I’m sure there’s a dating service waiting to happen right there.

Add comment April 15th, 2007

No wonder the online dating market is booming in the UK

According to the UK’s office for national statistics, more than seven million people in Britain live alone now, compared with three million in 1971. Single parent families are also on the rise, especially those with lone mothers. Not only are more people living alone or without a partner, people are also getting married later, especially the men. (Full BBC article here).

Add this to the fact over half of the UK’s adult population now have access to broadband and you’ll realise that not only is there a real need in this country for online dating services, the infrastructure exists to make it relatively easy for comapnies to fulfil that need.

1 comment April 11th, 2007

Get in there!

The book is almost ready and one of the final touches is getting some incentives in to add value to the book. I’ve already got a couple of companies giving me some promo codes/coupons, but there’s room for a few more if you’re quick. If you’re looking for what is basically free exposure to a load of target demographic, talk to me. I’m mostly interested in UK companies, but would also accept foreign ones who have a good UK membership base.

Add comment April 9th, 2007

What we can learn from social networking sites

There’s been much debate recently about the shift in the US online dating market. I’ve been following the discussions with interest. It looks like the market is slowing, social networking sites are taking a chunk of the audience and site owners are sniffing the trends and trying to combat the problem. Some sites are going from a free model to a paid model, others are going from a paid model to a free model and there’s some sites popping up that try to bring together social networking and dating to create something that will appeal to both audiences.

I think that if you’re sold on the idea that social networking is stealing your customers you gotta take more than a superficial view at what social networking sites do that dating sites don’t.

I gather that there’s lots of operators out there who went “oh, social networking is free and we’re trying to charge our users money, so no wonder they’re going away”. I think this is a rather simplistic way of looking at what your customers want or need. If you’re free, and Myspace is free, then what is your site giving your users that they can’t already get for free on Myspace? Are they going to have to spend months on your site filtering out the freaks? Time is money.

Continue Reading Add comment April 9th, 2007

Plentyoffish in the UK

Looks like Plentyoffish is going to do more stuff in the UK, with the launch of a new affiliate programme. The UK market still has a lot of scope for growth. I would say much more than the US market right now. We’ll see how big a chunk of that growth Plentyoffish can get.

I’d just like to point out the happy fact that 3 of the 7 sites mentioned in the Hitwise report are ours. Dating For Parents took a lot less than a year to hit the top 10. I’m not sure where our latest site stands, but it’s growing pretty fast so if it’s not there already it will be soon.

Oh, and our affiliate programmes (via Webgains or Tradedoubler) pay better. Just saying

Let the games begin.

3 comments April 8th, 2007

Rising standards

I’m surprised hotenough.org is the first site in the US to vet people based on looks. The UK’s Gorgeous Dating has been doing it for years and attracting some pretty well-off members who often say they’d never dream of dating on a “normal” site.

With online dating having now become so big, there’s gotta be a way for people to weed out those potentials they’re not likely to ever want to date. Regardless of what qualities you choose to vet people by, the mere act of making a site exclusive only to some daters is always going to be somewhat controversial. By the same token, there will always be a demand for it. The more people discover the fact that online dating usually involves a lengthy process of browsing, searching and physically dating a multitude of unsuitables, the more they will require market niching to make their lives easier. Clubs and bars reserve the right of admission to ensure the right atmosphere, so it was only a matter of time till dating sites started doing it too.

1 comment March 22nd, 2007

How far is too far?

In my quest for discovering new and exciting dating industry-related blogs, I recently came across Netchoice, who may be very US-centric, but seem to have a lot of good thing to say. This piece about True.com has gotten me thinking about the ethics of marketing a dating service. After all, people may be buying a subscription, but what we’re actually promising them are answers to their most intimate hopes and dreams. Sure, we all use phrases such as “get a date” and “find your soulmate” when we can’t actually guarantee all our customers will, but surely there’s a line that shouldn’t be crossed when it comes to actually lying to your customers?

Continue Reading Add comment March 22nd, 2007

Social networking Vs dating sites

I recently started reading The Paradigm Shift and came across the whole discussion about social networking sites.
I remember reading sometime last year (I think) about some research conducted across Europe that found that most people who used social networking sites, used them for social networking, rather than outright dating. I would add that even the dating done on social networking sites is usually (in my experience at least) very different to the type of dating done on dating sites. Standard dating sites are very focused. They’re very pragmatic, to the point of taking all the romance out of the process and turning dating into a business transaction. It’s basically a glorified meat market, whether you like it or not.
A lot of people have a problem with that approach. It takes a very particular state of mind to decide that you’re going to go online and basically “shop” for either a serious relationship or a shag. Obviously, this sort of online dating is popular for a reason and it helps millions of people find love everyday who probably wouldn’t have otherwise, but we as an industry have to admit that this form of dating is not right for everyone, just like “traditional” club/pub/work dating is not right for everyone.

Continue Reading Add comment March 17th, 2007

Shaadi.com advertising on the tube *

* That’s the London Underground, for you non-Brits

Just saw this ad today for Indian website, Shaadi.com:

Crappy pic, I know, but I didn’t have a proper camera on me. Click on the image for the bigger version.
It’s a bit unclear in the pic, but the woman is said to be a model into “modern art and boxing” and the guy is a “businessman” who likes Stallone and wildlife. The man is 5’11″ and 29, the woman is 5’4″ and 25. Seems like some very traditional, stereotypical assumptions are being made about the preferences of the target audience. Then again, The Asian community is often quite traditional so maybe they’ll all be flocking to Shaadi.com to find their own businessmen and models.
I noted there aren’t any calls to action, nor are there any promotional codes, mobile shortcodes or any other method of tracking conversions from this campaign. Pure branding? I hope they have money to burn. I know how much these campaigns cost…

Add comment March 15th, 2007

Is image really everything?

The NY times just published an article about online dating coaching. It totally summed up the main difference between the American and the British online dating scene for me.

This particular quote drew my eye:

Jim Safka, chief executive of Match.com, based in Dallas, says online dating is like being on stage and being viewed by thousands of people. “Wouldn’t you spend some time backstage getting ready?” he asked.

To me, comparing online dating to standing on a stage makes it sound like you are expecting people to put on a show, rather than just be themselves. Who wants to be in a relationship where they have to put on a show all the time?
Over here, people think about online dating more in terms of going down the pub (or bar, if they are a bit trendier) and meeting people. Sure, you want to make a good impression, but you’re not going to get a makeover for the occasion. In the UK, makeover photos are pretty much frowned upon. This is really the land of understatement.

Continue Reading Add comment March 13th, 2007

More about compatibility testing

Following on from my earlier post, I just came across an interesting discussion on reddit talking about personality testing, horoscopes, etc.. I think it illustrates my points quite well. Here is what someone got as his profile, without actually answering any questions:

You have a need for other people to like and admire you, and yet you tend to be critical of yourself. While you have some personality weaknesses you are generally able to compensate for them.

You have considerable unused capacity that you have not turned to your advantage. Disciplined and self-controlled on the outside, you tend to be worrisome and insecure on the inside. At times you have serious doubts as to whether you have made the right decision or done the right thing.

You prefer a certain amount of change and variety and become dissatisfied when hemmed in by restrictions and limitations. You also pride yourself as an independent thinker; and do not accept others’ statements without satisfactory proof. But you have found it unwise to be too frank in revealing yourself to others.

At times you are extroverted, affable, and sociable, while at other times you are introverted, wary, and reserved. Some of your aspirations tend to be rather unrealistic.

Is there anyone out there who could not see themselves in that?

This is obviously quite an extreme example of a bad personality test, but it does show how easy it is to fool people into believing you actually know something about them.

Add comment March 12th, 2007