Comments on: The problem with compatibility testing

By: Debbie

Debbie — Sun, 22 Mar 2009 21:16:22 +0000

To quote you ‘Surely what we, as humans, need to learn to do is to develop our instincts and intuition further so that we can make our own choices’.
Just wanted to say that I can’t agree with you more!
From a personal point of view, my third relationship is currently at breaking point and I’ve just realised that after all this time, although my instincts were saying NO, my desire to be in a relationship has consistently overridden my own intuition! I agree that ‘chemistry’ plays a major part in initial contact, but I fail to see how compatibility testing can work, unless it’s a very basic test, i.e, background, which I think everyone has the innate ability to determine for themselves. I for one have decided to place more trust in my intuition!

By: Shimrit

Shimrit — Sun, 11 Mar 2007 00:59:45 +0000

Thank you for my (first ever) comment.

I agree that what attracts people to each other for short term relationships differs from what attracts them to each other for long term relationships. I just think it’s wrong to assume that we are only equipped with the ability to choose one and not the other. I am not a believer in the theory that sees humans as nothing more than a sum of biological parts, but even if you think genetics and biochemistry are the main driving forces of human sexuality/love then you have to accept that a. there is an evolutionary need for people to form lasting bonds and b. people’s ability to meet and form lasting bonds perdates behavioural science.

By: Fernando Ardenghi

Fernando Ardenghi — Sat, 10 Mar 2007 21:25:58 +0000

“Why would we be given the ability to intuitively select a short-term mate but not a long-term mate? ”

* It seems that what is important in attracting people to one another may not be important in making couples happy.
* While opposites attract for short term affairs, similarity is preferred for marriage (Amodio & Showers, 2005).
* The divorce rate in (United States of) America hovers between 50 and 75% (Kreider and Fields, 2002).

Here are the links to:

THEORIES OF ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS DEVELOPMENT.
METHODOLOGICAL AND DATA ANALYTIC ADVANCES IN THE STUDY OF INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS
http://mb.internetdatingconference.com/scientific-papers-t395.html

and

DIFFERENT PERSONALITY TESTS FOR ON LINE DATING
http://mb.internetdatingconference.com/different-personality-tests-for-on-line-dating-t209.html

Kindest Regards,

Fernando Ardenghi.
Buenos Aires.
Argentina.
ardenghifer@gmail.com