Comments on: Online dating sites – they’re not all the same

By: phil

phil — Sat, 23 Jul 2011 19:36:45 +0000

Recently divorced after 22 years and 59 years old, what to do? I posted nice recent photos and a well written profile of myself. Can’t speak for others but mine is sincere. My photos and profile tell others I am fit, educated, and decent. Only a few women initiated contact with me, overweight and older than I am. I wrote pleasant E-mail messages to 21 women and get one response. I will not give up but I did not need this deflating experience after seeing my marriage end. I respond to anyone who contacts me, as i think it is common courtesy. I am gentle and cordial to them. On the other hand, as I said 20 women could not be bothered responding to me. Is the reality that there are many more men than women on these sites? These women, like myself, are decent in appearance, not earth shattering. What gives? It appears I will have to wait until someone introduces me to a lady because I get the feeling after a month that it is a waste of time and a crush to a person’s sense of esteem.

By: shawn

shawn — Thu, 30 Dec 2010 01:41:01 +0000

The reason why online dating does not work is because the women have it to good even ugly and marginal girls will get sum email.s no amount of game seduction are tactic really promises anything its just this simple they have it to good. the best you can hope for is having a little game and getting lucky.

By: Mr Blobby

Mr Blobby — Thu, 28 Oct 2010 23:24:12 +0000

I dont think the biggest problem is liars because liars are often willing to change. I think the biggest problem is that most sites don’t get rid of inactives making the whole situation very much about numbers and very little about getting it right. Almost like sending out CV;s for jobs to agencies LOL. I contacted four by reading their profiles and discussing their interests and heard from zero. At the same time I got spammed by cut and pasted Hey Mr nice profile messages or messages from sites trying to sell me stuff. So yep it has totally destroyed my confidence (maybe not in myself as much but certainly in the system)

By: Chavez

Chavez — Wed, 23 Jun 2010 18:30:51 +0000

Online dating takes a whole lot of patience and I would say the bad points seem to out weigh all the good ones. I’m in London and I met a women online who lived in Helsinki. After exchanging emails and talking on the phone I flew there to meet her. It never worked out even though she was a very nice womon. I put it down to cultural differences. The English are very differnet to Finns. I still think about her and wish it could have worked out. For me the distance wasn’t a issue.

By: pierre

pierre — Tue, 01 Jun 2010 15:26:16 +0000

Please Replace 1st and 2nd post thanks

Do the internet dating website work or is it really a waste of time and it would cost you about a hundred and twenty pounds a year that’s about ten pounds a month.

I have no idea what the average dating site percentage of success is or how many people there are who collect proper date?

Its better that your new friends do not live to far away from where you are living, remember the people who run the dating site offer no guarantee or a refund.

It can take many hours looking through the hundreds or thousands of profiles and e-mailing correspondence is very slow also blurred?
but in the event of send and receiving post for one year and not actually meeting anybody this will prove that it is unreliable and a waste of time also money so let’s put it to the test and spend ten hours every weekend searching and looking for a date.

For example if a person lives in London and only wants to meet somebody within the London transport system and is being realistic looking for some body maybe five these older or younger than themselves with a approximately the same interest, looks

I wonder how many people would prove to be available giving these parameters for your hundred and twenty pounds.And what do you do with time waster’s, people who do not want to participate seriously or even pay to become a full member.

By: Mel

Mel — Sun, 18 Apr 2010 15:18:26 +0000

I have tried 3 sites so far, One paid two free. The main problem I find is that many men want to talk about their private parts without even bothering to get to know you first. Obviously this is way to much to soon. Also I find men have made a list that is totally unrealistic. They want someone who is beautiful, fit, not married before, no kids, etc. etc. So many REAL women who have something to offer is passed over for Miss 24 with a pefect everything. Then men wonder why she lied. If she is all that how come shes single? I myself no longer check out good looking men as most seem to be not only egotistical and down right rude on their profiles. (I mean who would want to contact that?) I have been stood up on dates no less than 4 times. Had sex text pests. I have no idea what women are writing but I can say for sure there are some real women who are very nice looking for a nice person in return. These sites are no different than bumping into someone in a club which face it in your thirties and forties becomes less of a reality. Especially when kids are involved. NOT all people on these sites are losers. Just lonely hardworking and sincere people who are experiencing pitfalls of a highly fussy society.

By: Michael Seddon

Michael Seddon — Sat, 03 Apr 2010 09:34:11 +0000

People do misrepresent themselves on-line. But dont they do this to some extent in real life dating anyway ?

Most people show their best to begin with to make a good impression but sooner or later they revert to their ‘ natural ‘ state, nobodys perfect.

Ive seen many relationships that started on-line lead to marriage both national and international so you cant just say they dont work end of story.

I think if you have no doubts about what you want you can get it but some people are deluded.

By: nicko

nicko — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 23:09:28 +0000

im now on at least 6 dating sites, i have given an honest profile and photo, i have had little interest and it is my experience that communication when it does happen is short lived.
i have not had a date from these sites ever in a year.
i wont pay anymore its not worth the investment. one site i payed for was full of scammers who hook you then ask for money, if you see accounts have been deleted this is why. i dont know any way of meeting people.
internet dating is said to be growing rapidly but is anyone actually dating?
girls say they are fed up with meeting guys in bars so they turn to these sites, maybe they are spoilt for choice or become disalusioned with the liars we hear so much about?
if you do decide to join a site then have a good search before paying to see if there are enough people who you find interesting before paying,
as my search crteria is always the same i see the same faces that are still on the sites after months and months so i guess it is not working for these women either.
give it a go but dont get to excited

By: Pierre Antonio

Pierre Antonio — Fri, 04 Dec 2009 15:26:53 +0000

To the real world…. I believe it is dating madness and masturbation fantasizing about the possibility of dating someone without actually doing it for real.

There’s so much deception on both sides of the coin the people that are the play the game and the people who set it up

If 50, 0000 people every week went to a nightclub that facilitated singles to dance with each other and chat with each other?

For a reasonable amount of money you would at least meet many people every week.

No more mental masturbation enjoy the real physical world where all your senses are employed finding out about other people being happy in life finding the right relationship properly.

By: steve

steve — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 19:45:24 +0000

women see men as an item on a shopping list
the last thing on the list is love. and romance
but women keep going on about it
thats the first myth
“must make me laugh”
it was true they would
all be chasing comedians down the street
instead pop stars with the morality of a rattlesnake are the ones they chase.

the facts are that the concept of morality is totally alien
they want want want.
he must be good looking/
with a fat wallet/
but to get a fat wallet he has to work/
but if you work to much they feel ignored/
it basically boils down to one thing
baby’s sooner or later its on the menu
there programmed that way and the poor sucker
of a male is programmed to be a pathological fornicator
my own sister is nothing but a scumbag gold-digger
she makes heather mills look like a nun
and there is more heather mills out there than
stars in a galaxy theres more porn on the internet than
anything else and guess what it’s full of women I wonder why that is? there is only one women i have any respect for and that is my mother i assure you im not
a mummy’s boy but the women of this generation
are lying self centered and want everything
and dont know the meaning of the word sacrifice

By: Tim

Tim — Thu, 18 Jun 2009 10:59:53 +0000

Internet dating can work but it’s full of pitfalls. I’m a guy (in my 30’s) and to be honest not very forward, I signed up to 4 sites on/off in the last 18 months and while I’ve had several dates including a couple relationships I’ve now had enough.
The feedback I mainly hear from dates is that the sites do contain men (and women) who lie (age, marital status even photo). What this ultimately does is devalue the experience/chance for us genuine types. Yes it is very true, you do get interested in someone and all of a sudden they disappear – I term this ‘bumping’ (someone better just came along). This bumping can occur well after dating too, it seems the sites promote a ‘can I get anyone better’ attitude. Of course there are many generalisations here. Sometimes I’ve been bumped only to be contacted a few weeks later by the same person… ladies, I see what happened and guess what, I’m not interested.
Dating sites can knock confidence too, you’ve put the profile online, with a good photo/description and then nothing happens…you visit profiles, perhaps email and nothing materialises. Now this could be 2 things, 1 the site does not promote you or maybe you are just not what people are looking for (on face value). Neither does much for self esteem.
Overall my advice would be to try internet dating but time box each site (1 month max). I’m now doing what others recommend and getting out in life. Clubs/hobbies and social circles are far better to meet people.
Now in the time I’ve written this I’ve had 2 visits, 1 wink and 1 email from a dating site…do I get the feeling this new interest will be right for me…unfortunately no, I just can’t get excited anymore.

By: Denise

Denise — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 19:47:22 +0000

I’m finally going to meet someone I met on line tomorrow night. We’ve been corresponding for about 3 months. We have tons in common and he seems to be a really nice person. I must admit that I am not the trusting type, nor am I a risk taker. But, I’m willing to try. I’ve been unable to meet someone locally (off-line). So I tried this method. We’ll see what happens.

By: Shimrit

Shimrit — Wed, 13 May 2009 07:26:49 +0000

Susie, unfortunately, I can’t tell exactly where your problem with online dating lies, as I don’t know which sites you’ve dated on, nor do I know anything about you and your requirements. It could be that the sites you tried weren’t up to scratch or there could be a different reasons why you didn’t have any joy. However, if you want to meet someone not through online dating, I’d say the best way is to start expanding your social circle and the opportunities you have for meeting others – singles’ events or even just normal parties and meet ups, maybe some hobby classes where you can meet likeminded people, etc. Depending on where in the world you are, there are actually some dating sites where the list events you can go on. Even if you don’t meet someone you want to date straight away, making new friends can open doors in itself.

By: Susie

Susie — Sun, 03 May 2009 00:05:10 +0000

I have tried internet dating on multiple sites and NONE of them work. You start to write to somebody who looks like a match, nice looking, same interests, then poof! You never hear from them. Or somebody who sounds nice on line is not what you expect in person -strange personality, etc. Most of the men’s photos over 50 look way younger than their actual age. Oh and how about the guys who absolutely look disgusting – appearance, hairy faces, badly groomed/dressed – absolutely no appeal. You also can’t tell how someone is from photos. Plus – they do lie.!! I think the best way to meet is by chance out there – and how – please tell me. I am done spending money on the sites.

By: Shimrit

Shimrit — Mon, 30 Mar 2009 09:55:41 +0000

If you try dating online with this sort of negative attitude, you’re bound to get nowhere. People who lie online are exactly the same people who lie offline. It’s just easier for them to lie on the Internet than in their home town. The truth is, there are definitely losers online, but there are also normal, lovely people who are just looking for love. If you assume everyone is out to get you, you’re likely to totally miss out on the nice people out there, because a part of you will secretly want to meet the freaks, to prove to yourself your first impression was right. If the site you’re dating on is not delivering, try a better site and give it a chance.

By: Doug

Doug — Sat, 28 Mar 2009 05:31:44 +0000

Internet dating does not work for one simple reason: PEOPLE LIE! And for the most part…the people “looking for love” or a “love connection” are losers. The ‘internet space’ gives them pseudo-courage…to say things they wouldn’t have the cojones to say face-to-face. And to reinterate…people lie….ABOUT EVERYTHING. Either meet someone locally, or learn to live with yourself.

By: internet dating

internet dating — Sat, 01 Sep 2007 14:51:47 +0000

the reason why it’s not working for them is because they are doing things which DON’T work.

Another reason why it doesn’t work for some people is because they select the wrong site for what they’re looking for…

and the biggest reason why it doesn’t work for them is because they don’t understand HOW to meet women online.

Dave M.

By: Molly

Molly — Thu, 30 Aug 2007 01:07:27 +0000

Average looking men, especially need to understand that they need to contact many women at a dating site to get a few responses. The most attractive women will be heavily sought after and the competition can be fierce. Best to be original to stand out.